Posted by: Annette Grantham | January 26, 2011

You’re Not Listening

I said “My hands are itching like crazy” and he thought I said “I’m watching the boats.” I said “Maybe I’m a faery” and he thought I said “You’re crazy.” Obviously, he is not listening. I’m not even sure how he so completely missed what I said. Out of “hands”, “itching”, and “crazy”; he got “watching” and “boats’. Too funny.

Most of the time, I will start to say something and get mid-sentence only to have him start talking about something else or pick up his cell phone and call someone.

Then there are those times I tell him something and I think he heard me. Later he will tell me the exact same thing only it was his son or friend who told him this great idea or information. I remind him that I told him that previously. Oh, yeah.

When I confront him on this major problem, I get the usual excuse that he has so much going on in his head and he is ADD. Don’t we all have so much swimming around upstairs. Welcome to the information age. I just don’t like excuses. I ask him if he thinks he might have a hearing problem. He doesn’t have any problems hearing anyone else. I just speak too softly.

Easy enough. I try talking louder. It’s hard but I persist. Maybe I do talk too soft. Now he is telling me to keep my voice down and that I sound like his ex-wife. You probably think she was loud so he would listen. No, she was always loud. I still remember how loud she was in high school. Yuck.

I still have a bit of a Texan accent so I try to edit it. You know, maybe that’s the problem. That doesn’t make any difference either. I try talking s-l-o-w-e-r. It’s quite funny but doesn’t work. All it does, is annoy me. I already talk slow (Texan slow).

So now I’m trying short sentences and only tell him what’s necessary. It’s pretty stressful to fight the same battle everyday. If I want to discuss something in length, I’ll hit my blog. And maybe someday, I’ll invite him to read it.

I’m interested in any ideas so post them in the comments.



  1. I know my mom has the same problem with my stepfather sometimes. If need be, just write things down and hand them to him so he can understand that you need to be heard. Let him know you are bothered by it.

    • That’s good advice, Quanni. I will try it.

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